Divorce ends marriages but not parental responsibilities. Both spouses have a duty to their children to remain active parents throughout their children’s lives, but how do you actively co-parent with a former partner?
Luckily, there are strategies that any parent could implement into their parenting style, especially after a divorce. All you need is to remain open to new parenting techniques and prioritize your child’s interests first.
Learn how to communicate with your ex
Usually, the hardest aspect of parenting after divorce is communicating with your former spouse. It’s challenging because you went through an entire process to separate only to continue communication. However, you do not want to only communicate with your ex through your child. It will only take a toll on their emotional development.
Consider finding a neutral way to chat with your former spouse – like communicating through email, text messages or over the phone. It will reduce face-to-face discussion while still discussing your children.
Take time to establish the logistics as co-parents
Both parents need to know the technical details of parenting, including schedules, holidays, education and health decisions. Take some time to set a basic outline for co-parenting as divorced parents.
Include aspects such as who gets to parent on the weekends, who brings the kid to soccer practice and how gets to spend time with the child on which holidays. It will make the process easier for everyone if everything is established early on.
Remember that your child is a child
Divorce hurts everyone in the family, including your child, and it’s tempting to expose them to the harsh reality of relationships early on. But you need to let your kid be a kid. Inform them of the situation and then help them transition into a routine. Play games with them, encourage them to make friends, prioritize their homework in the evening: these are all ways you can help your kid stay in a healthy mindset for their age.
Spend quality time with your child
It’s easy to take your kid to the zoo or the movies every weekend, but you also need to make sure you take time to connect with your child. Also, you could spend quality time with your child and your former spouse, if the circumstances allow it. It may help your child transition while establishing your joint-support as co-parents.
In California, you will likely have joint custody of your child, so you need to know how to co-parent effectively. If you don’t, it harms your child’s future and their relationship with you.